2 Samuel 13:23-39
23 And it came to pass after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baalhazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the king’s sons. 24 And Absalom came to the king, and said, Behold now, thy servant hath sheepshearers; let the king, I beseech thee, and his servants go with thy servant. 25 And the king said to Absalom, Nay, my son, let us not all now go, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And he pressed him: howbeit he would not go, but blessed him. 26 Then said Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said unto him, Why should he go with thee? 27 But Absalom pressed him, that he let Amnon and all the king’s sons go with him. 28 Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant. 29 And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king’s sons arose, and every man gat him up upon his mule, and fled. 30 And it came to pass, while they were in the way, that tidings came to David, saying, Absalom hath slain all the king’s sons, and there is not one of them left. 31 Then the king arose, and tare his garments, and lay on the earth; and all his servants stood by with their clothes rent. 32 And Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David’s brother, answered and said, Let not my lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king’s sons; for Amnon only is dead: for by the appointment of Absalom this hath been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar. 33 Now therefore let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king’s sons are dead: for Amnon only is dead. 34 But Absalom fled. And the young man that kept the watch lifted up his eyes, and looked, and, behold, there came much people by the way of the hill side behind him. 35 And Jonadab said unto the king, Behold, the king’s sons come: as thy servant said, so it is. 36 And it came to pass, as soon as he had made an end of speaking, that, behold, the king’s sons came, and lifted up their voice and wept: and the king also and all his servants wept very sore. 37 But Absalom fled, and went to Talmai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day. 38 So Absalom fled, and went to Geshur, and was there three years. 39 And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.
If we read the account of David’s life given in the book of 1 Chronicles alongside what we find in 2 Samuel, we can see that 1 Chronicles gives to us a much more positive side of David’s rule. The book of 1 Chronicles was written at a later time to Israel and was focused on encouraging the Babylonian captives about their future. 1 and 2 Chronicles show God’s faithfulness to preserve His people and carry forward His plans despite how things may have seemed to Israel under various kings and in captivity. During the period we are in in 2 Samuel, 1 Chronicles focuses on David’s conquest over the Ammonites and his diligence to gather materials and make preparations for Solomon to inherit the throne and build the temple. 2 Samuel addresses David’s sin with Bathsheba and the sin that permeated and nearly destroyed his household. Combined, the two books provide a summary of this period in David’s life as a period of public success and private failure. In 2 Samuel 13, we see the events that unfolded in the aftermath of David’s sin with Bathsheba. The Lord had told David that “the sword shall never depart from thine house” (2 Samuel 12:10) and “I will raise up evil against thee out of thine own house” (2 Samuel 12:11). 2 Samuel 13 provides the means by which that “evil” would come to pass. David’s oldest son Amnon raped his half-sister Tamar and his sin would set Tamar’s brother Absalom on a path of revenge and hatred toward both Amnon and David (2 Samuel 13:1-22). Absalom’s actions in 2 Samuel 13:23-39 depict for us the nature of what it looks like for a man to take vengeance into his own hands. James 1:20 warns us, “the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.” This week, we will learn three things that sinful, human vengeance does.
First, it uses sinful means. Two years passed between the events with Amnon and Tamar and the events beginning in 2 Samuel 13:23. Those events ended with Tamar’s life in tatters, David being angry and inactive in the whole matter, and Absalom hating his brother Amnon. David’s failure to act seems to be the catalyst that led to the events that followed. Richard Phillips provides a healthy reminder to us, “When those entrusted by God to establish righteousness fail in their duty, the inevitable result is the spread of sin’s corruption.” David’s inactivity allowed Absalom’s hatred to fester toward Amnon and his respect for his father to be diminished. Absalom developed a plan to go to David and invite the entire royal entourage, including David, to come to his sheep farm to celebrate the time of sheep-shearing. Knowing that David would refuse his own invitation, Absalom insisted specifically that Amnon be able to attend. Either aloof, apathetic, or both, David granted Absalom’s request and Absalom had all of the king’s sons out to his farm for the celebration. Just as David had sent Tamar into disaster with Amnon in the first part of the chapter, his agreement here sent his oldest son right into a death trap. Absalom had his servants prepared to strike Amnon when he was well drunk at Absalom’s command and they killed Amnon which sent the rest of David’s sons fleeing back to the palace on their mules (v. 29). Absalom took vengeance into his own hands and this vengeance led him to utilize deception and commit murder. Not coincidentally, these are the same means that David used in 2 Samuel 11 with regard to Uriah to cover his sin with Bathsheba. This time, it was not covering adultery that led Absalom to do what he did. Instead, it was his deep-seated bitterness and hateful vengeance. His desire was to take matters into his own hands and carry out justice in the manner he thought fitting. There were two problems with this. First, the responsibility to carry out justice against Amnon was David’s, as the king, and not Absalom’s. God has given the responsibility of punishing law-breakers and evildoers to the government, not individuals (Romans 13:1-7). Second, vengeance ultimately belongs to the Lord. We do not have the right nor the authority to take matters into our own hands and carry out personal vengeance against anyone for personal matters. Rather, we are called to “bless” our enemies and “overcome evil with good” (Matthew 5:43-48; Romans 12:19-21). When we ignore that and take matters into our hands or take vengeance ourselves, we inevitably end up utilizing dishonest and sinful means to do so. Our wrath produces more unrighteousness.
Next, man’s vengeance produces painful grief. Inaccurate news returned to King David somehow that all of his sons had been killed instead of just Amnon. David’s response was one of intense grief. He tore his clothes and prostrated himself on the ground in front of his servants. After David’s initial response to the report he had received, somehow David’s nephew Jonadab was already privy to the truth of what happened. We are not told explicitly how Jonadab knew that only Amnon had been killed, but a strong possibility was that Jonadab was aware of what actually happened because he had been involved in Absalom’s plans for Amnon just as he had been involved with Amnon’s plans for Tamar. Perhaps he merely knew that Absalom hated Amnon and had connected the dots without being directly involved. Regardless, he is in a position to come and deliver better news to David than the original report. Jonadab has certainly already proven that he is no real ally of David or the family because it was his plan for Amnon and Tamar that sparked all of the turmoil that would plague David’s family for years. Jonadab was the type of figure that no one could directly pin with the crime or wrongdoing, but was somehow always lurking in the shadows and involved in the trouble. There are always two types of culprits when problems arise. There are those who are the direct cause that are overt in their actions. Then there are people like Jonadab who are more covert and subtle. The second type is far more dangerous. They exist behind the scenes sowing discord and manipulating others who will take the fall for them and what evil they want accomplished. Most people who observe such situations will never see people like Jonadab as the problem because they appear in the surrounding contexts to be helpful and look innocent. Jonadab pretends to be a helpful ally to David here that was trying to bring good news to the king’s hurting heart, but Jonadab was actually the root of all of the recent evil that had come upon David’s family with Amnon and Absalom. It takes discernment to spot such people. Just as Jonadab finished telling David what had actually happened, the rest of David’s sons came riding to the palace and joined their father in mourning for Amnon. Absalom’s vengeance had done no good. Rather than a means of justice, it served to only heighten the grief of the entire family. The wrath of man always produces painful grief.
Lastly, vengeance reveals cowardly fear. Rather than owning up to his crime and actions, Absalom fled. We may be prone to look at people who “grab the bull by the horns,” so to speak, and take matters into their own hands as brave people, but the opposite is true. People who have to take matters into their own hands, especially vengeance, actually reveal themselves to be the greatest cowards. It is because the person with the “take charge” mentality that sees themselves as the arbiter of justice, the means of setting things right, or the agent of God’s wrath inevitably does so from a place of pride and insecurity. Absalom did what he wanted with his brother and fled to his grandfather in Geshur. His mother Maacah was the daughter of Talmai who was the king of Geshur which meant that he was the offspring of one of David’s political marriages with a wife from a foreign kingdom. This provided him the opportunity to seek refuge away from God’s people in a foreign land. Despite his flight from Israel, we know that ultimately always finds people out (Numbers 32:23). We cannot outrun our sin because our sin is not external to us. It is internal. The guilt, shame, and consequences of our sin may be quenched or avoided for a time, but eventually there comes a payday. Absalom ran as a coward, thinking that he could avoid any consequences for what he had done. Meanwhile, David mourned the loss of his two sons. Absalom would be in Geshur for three years and “David longed to go forth unto Absalom.” Despite all that Absalom had done and would do, David’s longed to be reconciled to his son. His failure was that he was not willing to discipline any of his sons or reconcile with them on God’s terms by dealing with their sin. That failure would lead Absalom from murdering his brother to nearly taking the whole kingdom from his father.
When man says “Vengeance is mine!” we take upon ourselves a responsibility that we were never meant to have. God is the owner of all vengeance and while governments and authority figures are responsible in certain cases to carry out righteous justice, personal vengeance is never the right of any person. Absalom did not like how his father handled (or didn’t handle) Amnon’s sin so he took matters into his own hands. Human vengeance utilizes sinful means, produces painful grief, and reveals cowardly fear. May we learn the lesson of letting God be God and humbly submitting ourselves to His will rather than our own unrighteous anger and selfish ambitions. We must rest assured that no matter what apparent “good” we feel we may accomplish that what our pride and anger produce is only more sin. Instead, you and I are free in Christ under the sovereignty of God to “avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath” and “Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good” (Romans 12:19, 21). In the gospel of Jesus Christ, we see the holy wrath of God find its full satisfaction for sin when God poured out His wrath for our sin upon His only begotten Son. While David would lose several of his own sons as a result of his own sin, the Lord would send His Son to lay down His life for us so that we might be reconciled to Him and saved from the wrath and vengeance that we all deserve. When a person truly receives and understands the grace of God in the gospel, we must relinquish our rights to take vengeance ourselves. Vengeance belongs to Him. We are free to faithfully represent and model the grace, forgiveness, and blessing that has been shown us through the sacrifice of His Son.