1 Samuel 20:1-42

And David fled from Naioth in Ramah, and came and said before Jonathan, What have I done? what is mine iniquity? and what is my sin before thy father, that he seeketh my life? ² And he said unto him, God forbid; thou shalt not die: behold, my father will do nothing either great or small, but that he will shew it me: and why should my father hide this thing from me? it is not so. ³ And David sware moreover, and said, Thy father certainly knoweth that I have found grace in thine eyes; and he saith, Let not Jonathan know this, lest he be grieved: but truly as  he Lord liveth, and as thy soul liveth, there is but a step between me and death. ⁴ Then said Jonathan unto David, Whatsoever thy soul desireth, I will even do it for thee. ⁵ And David said unto Jonathan, Behold, to morrow is the new moon, and I should not fail to sit with the king at meat: but let me go, that I may hide myself in the field unto the third day at even. ⁶ If thy father at all miss me, then say, David earnestly asked leave of me that he might run to Bethlehem his city: for there is a yearly sacrifice there for all the family. ⁷ If he say thus, It is well; thy servant shall have peace: but if he be very wroth, then be sure that evil is determined by him. ⁸ Therefore thou shalt deal kindly with thy servant; for thou hast brought thy servant into a covenant of the Lord with thee: notwithstanding, if there be in me iniquity, slay me thyself; for why shouldest thou bring me to thy father? ⁹ And Jonathan said, Far be it from thee: for if I knew certainly that evil were determined by my father to come upon thee, then would not I tell it thee? ¹⁰ Then said David to Jonathan, Who shall tell me? or what if thy father answer thee roughly? ¹¹ And Jonathan said unto David, Come, and let us go out into the field. And they went out both of them into the field. ¹² And Jonathan said unto David, O Lord God of Israel, when I have sounded my father about to morrow any time, or the third day, and, behold, if there be good toward David, and I then send not unto thee, and shew it thee; ¹³ The Lord do so and much more to Jonathan: but if it please my father to do thee evil, then I will shew it thee, and send thee away, that thou mayest go in peace: and the Lord be with thee, as he hath been with my father. ¹⁴ And thou shalt not only while yet I live shew me the kindness of the Lord, that I die not: ¹⁵ But also thou shalt not cut off thy kindness from my house for ever: no, not when the Lord hath cut off the enemies of David every one from the face of the earth. ¹⁶ So Jonathan made a covenant with the house of David, saying, Let the Lord even require it at the hand of David’s enemies. ¹⁷ And Jonathan caused David to swear again, because he loved him: for he loved him as he loved his own soul. ¹⁸ Then Jonathan said to David, To morrow is the new moon: and thou shalt be missed, because thy seat will be empty. ¹⁹ And when thou hast stayed three days, then thou shalt go down quickly, and come to the place where thou didst hide thyself when the business was in hand, and shalt remain by the stone Ezel. ²⁰ And I will shoot three arrows on the side thereof, as though I shot at a mark. ²¹ And, behold, I will send a lad, saying, Go, find out the arrows. If I expressly say unto the lad, Behold, the arrows are on this side of thee, take them; then come thou: for there is peace to thee, and no hurt; as the Lord liveth. ²² But if I say thus unto the young man, Behold, the arrows are beyond thee; go thy way: for the Lord hath sent thee away. ²³ And as touching the matter which thou and I have spoken of, behold, the Lord be between thee and me for ever. ²⁴ So David hid himself in the field: and when the new moon was come, the king sat him down to eat meat. ²⁵ And the king sat upon his seat, as at other times, even upon a seat by the wall: and Jonathan arose, and Abner sat by Saul’s side, and David’s place was empty. ²⁶ Nevertheless Saul spake not any thing that day: for he thought, Something hath befallen him, he is not clean; surely he is not clean. ²⁷ And it came to pass on the morrow, which was the second day of the month, that David’s place was empty: and Saul said unto Jonathan his son, Wherefore cometh not the son of Jesse to meat, neither yesterday, nor to day? ²⁸ And Jonathan answered Saul, David earnestly asked leave of me to go to Bethlehem: ²⁹ And he said, Let me go, I pray thee; for our family hath a sacrifice in the city; and my brother, he hath commanded me to be there: and now, if I have found favour in thine eyes, let me get away, I pray thee, and see my brethren. Therefore he cometh not unto the king’s table. ³⁰ Then Saul’s anger was kindled against Jonathan, and he said unto him, Thou son of the perverse rebellious woman, do not I know that thou hast chosen the son of Jesse to thine own confusion, and unto the confusion of thy mother’s nakedness? ³¹ For as long as the son of Jesse liveth upon the ground, thou shalt not be established, nor thy kingdom. Wherefore now send and fetch him unto me, for he shall surely die. ³² And Jonathan answered Saul his father, and said unto him, Wherefore shall he be slain? what hath he done? ³³ And Saul cast a javelin at him to smite him: whereby Jonathan knew that it was determined of his father to slay David. ³⁴ So Jonathan arose from the table in fierce anger, and did eat no meat the second day of the month: for he was grieved for David, because his father had done him shame. ³⁵ And it came to pass in the morning, that Jonathan went out into the field at the time appointed with David, and a little lad with him. ³⁶ And he said unto his lad, Run, find out now the arrows which I shoot. And as the lad ran, he shot an arrow beyond him. ³⁷ And when the lad was come to the place of the arrow which Jonathan had shot, Jonathan cried after the lad, and said, Is not the arrow beyond thee? ³⁸ And Jonathan cried after the lad, Make speed, haste, stay not. And Jonathan’s lad gathered up the arrows, and came to his master. ³⁹ But the lad knew not any thing: only Jonathan and David knew the matter. ⁴⁰ And Jonathan gave his artillery unto his lad, and said unto him, Go, carry them to the city. ⁴¹ And as soon as the lad was gone, David arose out of a place toward the south, and fell on his face to the ground, and bowed himself three times: and they kissed one another, and wept one with another, until David exceeded. ⁴² And Jonathan said to David, Go in peace, forasmuch as we have sworn both of us in the name of the Lord, saying, The Lord be between me and thee, and between my seed and thy seed for ever. And he arose and departed: and Jonathan went into the city.

Proverbs 18:24 says, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” True friendship is hard to come by. But true friendship is not so easily defined. Many people consider those that they are around frequently, those that they like to be around, or those that make them feel a certain positive way friends. However, biblical friendship is not quite presented along those lines. Among the many examples of friendship we have in the Bible, none stands out quite like the story of David and Jonathan. Their friendship was forged in the crucible as Jonathan’s father, King Saul, wanted to kill David because he saw David as a threat to his reign as king. God had called David to be the next king of Israel and validated David’s anointing by giving him success and favor in the eyes of the nation. Most believe that Jonathan and David would have not been the same age. Jonathan was probably a seasoned warrior in his forties and David a young man in his late teens or early twenties when their friendship was formed. Other than those descriptive items, what made the friendship of David and Jonathan special? What does it teach us about true biblical friendship? The key to understanding their friendship is the word “covenant.” They had a faithful commitment to one another based upon God’s revealed will. True friendship and loyalty in the Bible is the mutual commitment and love for one another in light of God’s revealed will in the each other’s life. Ultimately, David and Jonathan’s story is about much more than them. It serves to model for us the covenant faithfulness of the Lord Jesus Christ who is the true “friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” This week, we will learn about four things that covenant relationship accomplishes.

First, we note that covenant provides help. After escaping Saul in 1 Samuel 18-19, David left Naioth in Ramah, where the Spirit of the Lord had caused Saul to strip naked and prophesy, and he returned to seek help from his friend Jonathan, Saul’s son. If we go back to 1 Samuel 18:1-4, we find out why. It is because God had “knit” their souls together and that Jonathan “loved him [David] as his own soul.” As a result of their “knit” souls, they “made a covenant.” In 1 Samuel 18:4, we read that Jonathan gave David his clothes, armor, and weapons as an act of allegiance to him. Those belongings identified Jonathan as the king’s son and heir to the throne. By giving those things to David, it was a display of Jonathan’s commitment to David being the next king. Their covenant was not on the basis of liking each other, but was on the basis of Jonathan’s recognition that God had called and anointed David as the next king. Jonathan’s commitment to David was to honor the plans of the Lord. Their true friendship was based on and committed to serving the purposes of God. Here in 1 Samuel 20:1-11, David appealed to Jonathan on that relationship. At first, Jonathan was not convinced that Saul was seeking his friend’s life again because in 1 Samuel 19, Jonathan had gotten his father to commit to no longer hunt down David. David gave him a test to see Saul’s reaction at David’s absence at a coming new moon celebration. (As a side note, the Bible does not condone David’s request for Jonathan to be dishonest and Jonathan’s dishonesty in honoring the request would not help matters later in the chapter.) Despite his reservations, Jonathan trusted David and promised to help David in any way that he could. The phrase “deal kindly” in verse 8 is key to this section. It is the Hebrew word chesed which is used throughout the Bible to describe God’s abiding, faithful, covenantal love and mercy toward His people. God would always act in the best interests of His own that He was in covenant with. The same is true today. In Christ, God has provided all that we need that pertains “to life and godliness” (2 Peter 1:3). He offers grace, mercy, and help in the hour of need for our weaknesses (Hebrews 4:14-16; 2 Corinthians 12:7-10). Likewise, those that we are committed to in His name should expect our commitment to reflect this same help and support.

Next, covenant promises faithfulness. In verses 12-17, when Jonathan made a covenant with David to always act in his best interests as the next king, it is important to note that what he did makes no sense from a human perspective. It was essentially Jonathan giving David his place. However, when we consider that God had promised the kingship to David, it makes what Jonathan did the wisest possible thing for him to do. He acted based upon God’s revealed Word, will, and promises. He sought God’s kingdom above his own (Matthew 6:33). Every “hero” of the Bible came to a point where they made this same decision. Hebrews 11 is full of accounts of people who gave up their own “kingdom” and way in this world for God’s kingdom and eternal life.  The same decision is before us. We either spend our time in this life building our own kingdom down here or we forfeit our lives now for the sake of God’s kingdom (Luke 9:23-26). That is the call of discipleship, to deny ourselves and follow Christ. Jonathan promised to act faithfully toward David for all of his days in recognition that David would act faithfully toward him and his descendants. By forfeiting his throne, he would receive the covenant love of God’s king.  Jonathan promised to warn David of his father’s intentions toward him with the sign of shooting arrows while David hid by “the stone Ezel.” The word “Ezel” means “separation” or “departure” and it would be the point that David would eventually depart into the wilderness on the run from Saul. It would also serve as a sign of Jonathan’s covenant faithfulness to David and David’s future faithfulness to him and his descendants.

Third, covenant calls for sacrifice. On the first day of the new moon celebration Saul didn’t overreact to David’s absence, but on the second day he asked Jonathan about David and Jonathan told Saul the lie that David had requested him to tell. At this, Saul was enraged and began to accuse Jonathan of conspiring against him. When Jonathan tried to defend David’s innocence before Saul, Saul threw the javelin that he had previously thrown at David, at him. Jonathan angrily arose and went out to meet David. Notice that Jonathan put his own life on the line before his father. Everything about Saul’s motivations and actions were driven by pride, selfishness, and jealousy. He mentioned a concern for Jonathan’s kingship after him, but even that was not about a true care for Jonathan and a manipulative statement meant to bring Jonathan back to his side. Because of his allegiance to David, Jonathan was persecuted by his own father; he threw a spear at him. Likewise, when you and I surrender to follow God’s true Anointed King, the Lord Jesus, it will cost us. We will not only forfeit our “throne” (figuratively) in this world, but we will suffer the hatred of the world around us. Covenant calls for sacrifice. Christ laid down His life for us and we are called to lay down our lives for His sake and one another’s sake (1 John 3:16).

Lastly, covenant gives security. Just as he had promised, Jonathan went out the next morning and shot the arrows in David’s direction. If the instructions Jonathan gave to the young boy that would go to fetch his arrows were that the arrow was beyond the boy, then David knew that it was not safe for him with Saul. Jonathan gave that instruction to the young boy when he went to retrieve his arrows and, as the boy went farther in search of them, David came out from his hiding place, he embraced Jonathan, they wept together, and Jonathan told him to “Go in peace.” While David would not experience “peace” with Saul in this world and would experience very little of it as king, he did have “peace” with God and “peace” with his friend Jonathan because of the covenant that they had made together. For us, the “Friend that sticketh closer than a brother” has provided peace for us with God (Romans 5:1). By laying down His life for us and being “the Way” of eternal life (John 14:6), you and I now can receive of His “peace that passeth all understanding” (John 14:27; 16:33; Philippians 4:7). Our peace today is not in a human relationship, but in a covenant relationship with the One who laid down His life for us. That relationship brings a lasting security that no one or nothing can alter (John 6:35-40; 10:27-29).

Proverbs 18:24, the verse we opened with, is so helpful for us to understand what God teaches us in the story of David and Jonathan. It is meant to point out the importance of mutual commitment in friendship (“A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly”), but it is meant to point us beyond our human relationships to a greater one (“and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother”). That is what we learn from the friendship of David and Jonathan is that our friendships, our loyalty, and our commitments in this life must be outworkings of our relationship to the “friend that sticketh closer than a brother,” the Lord Jesus Christ. Our commitment to others is only good in so far as it honors our commitment to Him. Our loyalty to others is only good if it honors our loyalty to Him. Therefore, our friendships, partnerships, and commitments in this life should reflect the covenant love that has been shown to us and that we are called to have toward the Lord Jesus. Christ provides help, promises faithfulness, laid down His life for us in sacrifice, and He gives lasting security. Are you extending those covenant graces to others? Are your relationships with other people shallow and superficial, lacking real substance or depth? Are they based on what you can gain from people, using them to achieve your ends? Perhaps it is because you’ve never truly come to know the One who laid down His life for you. Come find the help, faithfulness, sacrifice, and security that that relationship brings. Only then will you be able to extend it to others in His name.